What is my worth?
Some Christian preachers teach that I am nothing--sinful, wretched, a black spot upon the earth. Sometimes, I have proven them right.
These same preachers teach that Jesus died....for me. If I were the only person on earth, he would have still borne my sin and penalty. He loves me that much.
On one hand I am nothing; on the other the object of love for the Creator of the vast universe.
On the one hand the existence of my self is an abomination; on the other, supreme motivation.
Some never move from the one hand to the other. Others are tossed from hand to hand like an orange, juggling ball. It makes us dizzy.
We hover in our spiritual lives between the complete denial of self and the reclamation of our True Self. Sometimes they are one and the same. Sometimes they diverge like Robert Frost's path in the woods.
Sometimes, we just sit at the fork in the road, too immobilized to move in either direction, waiting for some fellow traveler to come along and give us directions.