Peanut Butter, Salmonella, and Hypochondria

So, a couple of days ago, I felt completely awful. It was the day before Valentine's day and in the late afternoon, I began to feel extremely uncomfortable. My stomach, intestines, and basically every part of my abdomen felt bloated, uncomfortable, and achy. I retreated into the bedroom after my husband came home and just lay there for several hours. I didn't have a fever or any other manifestations of illness. By 9:30, I was feeling about 80% normal.

Imagine my surprise when I heard the news report on recalled Peter Pan peanut butter earlier today. I went to my pantry, where I happened to have some Peter Pan peanut butter. Actually, we had already finished one of two jars that I had bought during a "buy one get one free" sale. I checked the top of the lid; we had the winning code! The one time my code matches something and the prize is salmonella. We would have much preferred winning a new car or even a toaster.

There's nothing like harboring stomach-churning toxins in your cabinets. They go so well with bread and jelly.

Now, it could be mental hypochondria, but it made me go "hmmmm." Of course, my intestinal discomfort could have resulted from my very bizarre lunch of half a loaf of french sourdough bread with butter; but, I feel much more comfortable blaming the licking of the knife after I made my son his peanut butter and banana sandwich. It's nice to have someone to blame.

If I stop posting on my blog, it will be because I'm in the hospital. Be sure to send me some flowers.