Mammoth Cave

During the second day of our trip to Illinois, we stopped in Kentucky at Mammoth Cave. We took a 2-hour/2-mile tour through the cave, and we had a great time. Our tour guide was a colorful former Vietnam Vet, former drill sergeant, native Kentuckian, who was related to one of the original owners of the cave when it was still privately owned. He possessed a great talent for spinning tales and engaging the crowd of 100 tourists. I didn't get a great picture, but here he is at the beginning of our tour.

As we approached the mouth of the cave, cool air rushed over us, banishing the humid stickiness that enveloped the rest of the park.

We descended 200 stairs into the cave and began the tour. Overall, it was relatively easy. There are some tight spaces, and several places where the trail narrows the crowd into a single file line. The trail was rough and dark, but doable with common sense.

The cave itself is enormous in certain parts. The Rotunda Room, one of the larger parts of the cave, could easily hold a baseball stadium. Several sections open up into cathedral-worthy heights. Other sections, such as Fat Man's Misery and Tall Man's Agony, are not for the claustrophobic. They are true to their names, but fun to traverse through.

The biggest disappointment lay in the fact that Mammoth Cave is, in general, not a growing cave. There are no stalactites, stalagmites, or bizarre mineral growths to see. Intuitive Monkey was discouraged because he had looked forward to finally seeing them, only to discover that there weren't any there. He got over it and still had fun careening through the rocky darkness, as did we all.

If we had had more time, it would have been fun to camp in the rest of the park. It was a luscious, wooded, green forest filled with hiking and bike trails. Maybe we'll make it back some day.

More pics, just because.

Monkey says he's not mad in this picture, just trying to look tough.

Road Trip Recap and Words of Advice

1. It is possible to travel 2300 miles round trip with a six-year-old and eight-year-old without killing either one of them, or yourself.

However, not screaming at them, or issuing idle threats, while they wrestle and throw pillows at each other as you're trying to drive through a pouring thunderstorm, pinned between two semi-trucks going 70 mph, is impossible.

"Don't make me pull over this car!"

"You will lose your Wii and TV privileges for a month if you don't cut it out!!"

"You will lose your Wii, TV privileges, and outside time for 2 months if you don't stop NOW!!!!"

You won't leave your room or see the light of day until school starts if this behavior doesn't STOP IMMEDIATELY!!!!!

"I will suck the oxygen out of the car, and not let you breathe another lungful of air if you don't CEASE AND DESIST THIS VERY MINUTE!!!!!!!!

These incidents were brief, but always seemed to come at the worst time.

2. OK. If you live in, or near Atlanta, we need to have a little talk.

Now, I know it probably isn't you personally, but I'm willing to bet your family and friends are terrible drivers. Not the don't-know-how-to-operate-a-vehicle kind of bad drivers, but the tail-gating-the-car-ahead-of-them-at-80-mph-while-swerving-through-three-lanes-of-traffic-without-signaling-and-talking-on-the-cell-phone, or smoking a joint like one mullet-headed SUV driver next to me, kind of bad drivers.

You know it's true, just admit it.

I have driven through many major metro areas, but Atlanta is the only one that make me white-knuckle my through it with visions of multiple-vehicle, fiery, car crashes.

3. Rest areas are your friend. Use them every chance you get and don't believe any child who says they don't need to--they're wrong.

4. Even kids get tired of McDonald's after a couple of days.

5. When staying in motel rooms, try not to let the 20/20 special you saw about bed bugs, and germy sheets play over and over in your head. You'll never sleep.

6. Add an hour and a half to any estimated time Mapquest gives you. Their travel times are only accurate for robotic machines that can fly over traffic jams, never need to refuel, eat, or use the bathroom. If you are a robotic machine, disregard this advice.

7. Drive defensively. Assume everyone else on the road is drunk, having a heart attack, off their meds, or driving with a six-year-old and eight-year-old throwing pillows at each other in the back seat. It's the only thing that explains the craziness you'll encounter on the road.

Out of Commission

I won't be blogging for a few weeks. It's been hard, in general, to blog lately. Having the kids at home for the summer has kept me busy and also made it difficult to focus much when using the computer.

In addition to all that, my mother was involved in accident with a horse she was transporting a few days ago. She was trampled and has a broken leg and possibly broken ribs. We are heading up to Illinois for a week and a half so I can help take care of her for a short while as she begins to recover.

It will be just me and the kids because DH has already used two weeks of vacation; one for my surgery and one when we were up at his parent's house, keeping watch of his father while his mother was out of the country. He also has some significant deadlines he must meet by the end of the month. Despite the fact that it means I have to do all the driving, it's OK. At least we won't have to worry about what to do with the dog.

I have a little side trip, to Mammoth Cave, built into our travel time on the way up. We'll be taking the Historic Tour of the cave. I'm as excited as the kids are about it. Intuitive Monkey wanted to know if he would get to wear a miner's cap, with a flashlight on the top of the hat.

Anyway....Pray for me, and my kids, and my mom. For my mom....that she would recover well. For me and the kids....that we'll travel safely....and that we all survive with our sanity intact after so much "quality" time together in a car. :-)

Road Trip Recap

1.--Mapquest LIES!! 15 hours is really 18.5

2.--When devising your own detour through Birmingham, it helps to have the map right-side up; thereby avoiding an hour of wasted time before you realize that the left you made was really supposed to be a right!

3.--A Mazda Miata looks like a tiny bug to a semi driving 80 miles an hour.

4.--Never drink two cups of coffee and one bottle of water right before you drive through deserted highways with no gas stations in sight!

5.--You know you've hit the South when the continental breakfast served at the hotel has biscuits and gravy. yummy! I haven't had that in almost ten years.

6.--Memphis really needs some road improvements!

7.--Home never looked as good as it does after driving until midnight!